Matthew 18:15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.
This passage of scripture gives us the directives and format for resolving issues amongst us as brethren in the Christian community. Christ saw fit to lay out these important guidelines so as to maintain the unity and brotherhood of believers, as far as possible. He begins with the fault that may occur two believers, and He stresses the importance of humility by the one who is in the right, taking the initiative of solving the problem. It is often the case that our human pride prevents us from going to the one who has wronged us, for we sometimes think that to do so would be to stoop below our dignity, and because of this attitude, wrongs are left to fester and foment for months and even years, until the devil provides the opportune moment for us to blurt out what we were harboring on the inside.
The general rule of thumb when handling sensitive issues between brethren, is to first pray about it and then ask God to provide the earliest opportunity for resolution, for in this way the "Beef" can be cooked and discarded before satan can have a chance to stir the pot. Let's read:
Ephesians 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: 27 Neither give place to the devil. 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
The issue of privacy is also addressed by Christ, for in our first passage He stipulates that the issues must be dealt with only in the presence of the two believers who are at odds, and under no circumstances are we divulge any information to anyone else at this stage, because the motive is to preserve each others' reputation and integrity as much as possible, during the reconciliation process. Furthermore, it is a fact that whenever personal information about a private matter between two brethren begins to circulate, the story usually becomes greatly exaggerated and distorted with every repetition, and by the time it has run its course through the rumor mill, two completely different accounts usually emerge, thus making it all the more difficult for a Christlike resolution to take place. This course of action we are strictly forbidden to pursue, for it is very unlike Christ's dealing with us. Let's read:
Proverbs 17:9 He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends.
Proverbs 11:13 A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter.
Proverbs 18:7 A fool's mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul. 8 The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.
Last but not least, is Christ's instruction to take the matter gradually up the chain of command, if it cannot be resolved at the lower and more private levels, and then, if there is no way out, the church should be made privy to the issues, in the hope that a lasting agreement may be accomplished. But if not, then the one who is confirmed to be in the wrong should be relieved of his or her fellowship with the body of believers, leaving the door open for future resolutions to take place, if at all possible.
It's very important for us to follow the guidelines Christ has laid down, for if we do, it will have the effect of fostering peace, unity, and brotherhood, and an environment that will be very difficult for the devil to penetrate. We therefore end with a passage of scripture which should encourage us to pursue peace along godly lines and Christlike modes of thought, for the unity of Christians is of paramount importance to the spreading of the gospel, by which it becomes authentic in the minds of those who do not know Christ. Let's read:
Romans 12:17 Recompense to no man evil for evil".... 18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. 19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. 21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
May God add His blessing to the study and practice of His word. "Good night' and God bless!