Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.
The original purpose of God in instituting marriage and the family unit was that it should be the foundational building block of society, where the husband, wife, and children are a part of a complete and cohesive whole. After Adam and Eve sinned God found it necessary to again establish order in the family by placing the husband at the head, with the wife being subject to him in the fear of God, and the children being subject to both parents. This pattern when not disturbed is still productive of much good and stability in those families that adopt the wise arrangement given us by God.
However there are certain issues pertaining to this arrangement that should be made crystal clear from the Bible, for we are now living at a time when people are becoming more and more independent in thought and action, and instead of breeding successful family units after God's own order, we are finding more single parent families, with loneliness on the increase as a direct result. The Father is not to exercise his authority in any arbitrary, authoritarian manner towards his wife and children, for this will often produce resentment and rebellion in the hearts of both. Every requirement or law given in the family should be done in consultation with the wife, for she is an intelligent, thinking human being, just as the father is. However, if heads butt on a certain issue that does not interfere with one's salvation, the mother should be willing to yield to the father's preferences for the sake of harmony and peace.
This is where there are often fierce battles within the home, since because of the women's liberation movement, many wives assert their right to do as they please, regardless of the order that God has established. When wives rise up in opposition to the the husband's reasonable requests, then this attitude is passed on to the children who are keen observers, and since rebellion is contagious, it often results in everyone asserting his or her rights, with no regard for any God-ordained authority. Hence the reason why the passage for today states that as Christians, we should be willing to submit ourselves to one another in the fear of God , and according to the pattern laid down.
Disagreements are never ever resolved if one or the other is not willing to submit, and when differences of opinion arise, the word of God should always be used as the determining factor as to which course of action to pursue. But if the matter is a gray area, where no specific Biblical counsel is known or given, then the issue should be decided from a common sense perspective, rather than a personal preference. The wife is not to usurp the God-ordained position of the father in households where there is a complete family unit, for this often drives the man into a reclusive mode of thought, on account of his God-given authority being violated. This then opens up the door for "Strangers" to fill the void, and the devil is known to have bag fulls of "Strangers" waiting in the wings to cause havoc at any opportune moment.
When God created man He gave him dominion, and a man must have a sense of dominion if he is to fulfill his duty as a good husband. But if his dominion is trampled upon or interfered with for reasons which have no scriptural foundation, then he usually goes on the offensive, since it is in his very nature, to protect and preserve his territory as best he can. This is the reason why the Bible cautions against meddling with a man's territorial rights, whether it be with his wife, his children, or his domain. Let's read:
Proverbs 6:32 But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. 33 A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away. 34 For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance. 35 He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though thou givest many gifts.
In our day we have wives rising up in defiance of husbands, and husbands retaliating in like manner, and children are growing up with no regard for parental authority, and as a result the fabric of modern society is reaching a dangerously low ebb. This situation need not be the case, if only we would return to God's original ideal that was obviously given in His infinite wisdom, and for our very best good. We therefore end with a passage of scripture which enjoins the re-establishment of the family unit as a complete and cohesive whole, for we will all benefit from the wisdom of God displayed in our behalf. Let's read:
Colossians 3:17 And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. 18 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 20 Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. 21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 23 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; 24 Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.
May The Lord add his blessing to the study and practice of His every word. God bless!